Pride in the shirt, lads

“I want people to stand up and have a backbone and stand to attention when you hear your anthem, and look at that flag and recognise there were people who went out one day with very little chance of victory, who were prepared to put their lives on the line so this nation could be reawakened to what was possible if we took control of our own affairs,” he said.

Inspiring. He’s right you know. In fact, we should be taking a leaf out of other countries’ books and hanging flags everywhere, all the time. Think how fantastic it would be to drive around Lucan and see every single semi detached house with an Irish flag in the front garden. Nothing would raise the national spirit more than a tricolour on every bumper on the M50. And they should make it mandatory to play the national anthem at the closure of nightclubs. Maybe it is mandatory, but my drinking habits prevent me from noticing. In which case, they should make it illegal for people to get so drunk that they can’t stand for the national anthem. No: they should make it legal for bouncers to shoot people who don’t stand for the national anthem. Everyone should download Amhrán na bhFiann as a ringtone, and Gardaí should perform ‘stop and recite’ searches where they check if people know the words. They should also ban people from singing ‘oo baby let the free birds fly’ when The Fields of Athenry is getting played. Or maybe they should make it compulsory? I am undecided.