Get Your Breakfast Rolls Out For The Lads

Now Irish women vomit at bus stops like good English girls, teenagers booze in packs, and alcohol-related violence has rocketed. Drunken Irish football fans even shout in mockney accents picked up from English TV, which carry a certain chav chic.

What the Irish have forgotten is that sobriety is part of their heritage. The 19th-century temperance movement had a nationalist undercurrent. Its slogan, “Ireland sober is Ireland free”, was so successful that even now the country has the highest proportion of teetotallers in Europe.

But that is changing. Ireland is now free, rich, drunk and Anglicised: English shops dominate the high street; that oxymoron, English celebrity culture, is everywhere; British tabloids have taken over; English football is the new religion; and Tesco has “pacified” the country way beyond Gladstone’s wildest dreams.

Personally, I don’t recall a time when Irish women didn’t vomit at bus stops and teenagers didn’t booze in packs. However, what is this thing about shouting in ‘mockney’ accents? Have people any experience of this?

I used to go into a pub in England to watch football on Norwegian satellite TV. (Not that I was a huge football fan: I was in England at the time) There was one big fat guy who would bellow ‘Savoooo!!’ in a mockney accent every time a footballer fluffed a shot, or mis-hit a pass. ‘Savoooo’ referred to Savo Milosevic, an ungainly Aston Villa signing from the salad days of big foreign signings. I don’t know why I am telling this story.

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1 Response to “Get Your Breakfast Rolls Out For The Lads”


  1. 1 Donagh November 27, 2007 at 11:42 am

    Last night, at around 1 am someone pulled their car over outside our house, got out and lay on the road moaning ‘oh god, oh god’. Before we could get to him to see if he was in danger he got up and stumbled back to the car. He was clearly very drunk and someone passing by started to talk to him. This morning his car was still there, parked about a foot out from the curb. I couldn’t decern if he spoke with a mockney accent, but I know the car has an British reg.


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