Bestride myself with boredom

It’s raining in Ireland, and I’m sat reading the Irish Independent site again. That must be the saddest line I’ve ever written.

David Quinn is battering on about how the GAA is a bit like the Catholic Church in its ability to straddle its world like a sad-eyed circus freak. There is not much else in the article, apart from complaints about ‘liberals’ and sticking up for the Pope.

Once you see the verb ‘bestride’ in a sentence, you can be pretty sure that a colossus will be along without delay. Someone should propose alternatives.

  • He bestrode the world of second-hand car dealing like a giraffe
  • She bestrode the world of jazz singing like a giant tuning fork

Tell you what, ‘liberals’ are getting a quare and shocking pasting in the Irish Incontinent of late. The other day Kevin Myers berated their lily-liveredness at refusing to countenance the apparent fact -according to him- that every Irishman is a potential terrorist and should therefore not be allowed entry to Ireland. For this, he draws upon the historic behaviour of Irish people in Britain. An excerpt:

And terrifyingly, there is no large-scale Irish rejection of the murderous projects of their compatriots in Britain; no mass-rallies of Irish denouncing Irish Republicanism; no call from within Irish society for nationalists to join the army or police; and no unconditional and all-embracing campaign to extirpate murderous fundamentalism from within Irish society. Even “liberal” Irish blame British policy for Irish terrorism in Britain, while remaining silent about the unspeakable Catholic-on-Catholic atrocities in Northern Ireland.

Or something like that. He bestrides the local world of sensationalist demagoguery like a…

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July 2007
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