Archive for January 9th, 2007

I Smell Pork Scratchings

Oh dear. Foot and Mouth scare in County Antrim. That means awful vistas of piles of burning pigs, not to mention heartwarming Babe-style stories about little piglets who escaped the cull.

There not too many words for pig in English. Pig, hog, and swine, and that’s about it. In Spanish, there are lots of words for it: cerdo, guarro, marrano, cochino, puerco, chancho, and probably plenty more. Yet, and I may stand corrected on this one, none of them is used to describe a police officer.

Perhaps the best song about pigs is Who’s Gonna Feed Them Hogs by Tom T. Hall. A couple of sample verses:

I met him in a hospital about a year ago
And why I still remember him I guess I’ll never know
He’d lie there and cry out in a medicated fog,
“Here I am in this dang bed and who’s gonna feed them hogs?”


Four hundred hogs comes to eight hundred hams
And that’s a lot of money for a hog-raisin’ man
Four hundred hogs comes to sixteen hundred feet
The market’s up and there are people a-waitin’ on that meat

Touched by the trotter of God, that song.

Update: Turns out it wasn’t Foot and Mouth. Sleep well, little piggies.

Powers Al Fresco

What in the name of Shake N’ Vac are ‘fresh powers’?

Meanwhile, it emerged in the assembly on Monday that police in Northern Ireland are to be given fresh powers to seize documents and files in order to tackle serious crime.

I mentioned the use of this particular adjective before.

Yet another petri-dish piece of legislation for Northern Ireland. Wouldn’t it be great if it was like this all the time?

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January 2007