It’s Not Because I’m Tight-fisted….

There are no sperm donors in Northern Ireland, it says here. And the only remaining sperm donor in Scotland has his hand full with requests.

This is because of new legislation under which sperm donors cannot remain anonymous. I guess I can understand why so few men would wish to donate, not least because of the fear that one day there’d be a fateful knock on the door and it’d be your son, who could very well be a mass-murderer, or an estate agent. And all because of the fact that twenty years previous, you figured it might be a bit of a laugh to go down the sperm bank as a means of spending a couple of hours away from the PlayStation.

Northern Ireland people have to go to Spain now to get sperm donations. How this will affect Northern Ireland’s FIFA ranking is anybody’s guess.

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September 2006

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